The Peacocking Guide to the Galaxy: Seven Shoes Carrie Bradshaw Wouldn’t Wear

Welcome to The Peacocking Guide to the Galaxy. Ridiculous fashion for normal(ish) people. 

Fashion peacock (n.): A fashion consumer who wears eye-catching clothes for the sake of being eye-catching, similar to the behaviors of their animal namesakes.

Carrie Bradshaw loved her shoes.

Wait, no, let me rephrase: Carrie Bradshaw loved pumps, specifically dainty Manolo Blahniks with a 3-5 inch heel in a rainbow of colors and prints. Whether strappy, peep-toe or D’Orsay, I have to say (and I hate to crush your early 2000s fashion perceptions) Carrie Bradshaw’s shoe taste was a little basic.

Basic, that is, compared to the street-style stars of today. Rather than mere functional styling pieces,the  must-have shoes of the year take center stage all by themselves. It’s a sartorial time period where there is no overarching trend-- giving designers and dressers the freedom to pick and choose different decades and trends to form a unique personal brand. In past eras, everyone flocked to a similar style, like the drop-waist dress in the ‘20s, the skirt suits of the ‘60s or the shoulder pads of the ‘80s.  In Carrie’s day, a killer shoe collection usually coincided with at least owning one tutu (sorry, that’s the last Sex and the City jab from this Miranda). But the current make-it-your-own approach lends to the wealth of street style inspiration for any look: the flower children, the ‘90s kids, the rock-and-roll revivalists. Whatever the look, there’s a shoe for that.

Can’t walk in heels? Meet the pom pom festooned sneakers. Can’t fit enough glitter in the first 4/5ths of your outfit? Dolce’s got you covered. Still mourning Bowie? There’s a boot for that.

Here are my picks for the peacock-perfect addition to your closet-- both the real and the (very) aspirational.

The Ugly-Pretty Shoe: A cross between the Euro-classic clog with a woolly mammoth. Hey, Fashion Week hybrids are all the rage.  

$685, Brother Vellies

The Descended-from-a-Unicorn Pump: When fur on the toe ceases to be exciting for your peacocking ways, add on a pink fur tail, some glitter fabric and a gold trim. In my vivid, prolonged daydream where I own these shoes, I pair them with vintage Levi’s.

$1445, Dolce & Gabbana

The Washington Wizard of Oz Cross Over: These are perfect for those days when you want to make a statement, but also have to run to class. Run, don’t walk down the yellow brick road.

$138, ASOS White x Saucony

The Bit of Bowie Boot: A 5-inch heel, daunting platform, and white star print all prove these are not for the faint of heart.

$73, Daisy Street

The Sock Boot: Can anyone say Yeezy? Trade in his signature neutrals for a shiny silver version.

$59.90, Zara

The Love Story Loafer: A contrasting loafer pairs well with turtlenecks and tortoiseshell glasses—make Ali McGraw proud.

$119, Zara

The Athleisure Platform: Nineties kids, I didn’t forget you! These are begging to be reunited with mom jeans and an Alexander Wang ensemble.

$89.90, Zara